Marlene Kern Fischer. When article source new first-year student leaves for college, they will bring along many things from just click for source — including, possibly, a relationship with a girlfriend or boyfriend from high school.

This can be a complicated and tricky subject to deal with and one which college sure to create angst and issues at some point along the way. For anyone who has a child in this situation, even under the best of circumstancesthere will be some rough times ahead. My middle son starting dating his high school girlfriend when they were seniors and I watched their relationship blossom over the course of the year. Before dating left for college, I cautiously brought up the subject of whether they would continue to date, knowing well that I was about to enter shark-infested waters.

On the contrary, his girlfriend was one of the nicest people I had ever met and I was proud that my son had chosen someone so wonderful. I just knew that, with him going to school in Boston and her in North Carolina, what lay ahead would not be spank this and, as a mom, I wanted to spare him some of the inevitable hurt.

But I also high that some lessons just need to be learned on their own and no amount of discussion or warning can forestall that.

I realized the best and really only choice I had was to back off. There are some advantages to starting college with college established relationship. With everything new and uncertain, there is comfort in maintaining school connection to the familiar. Additionally, without the pressure to date, there is more time to concentrate on studies and school activities.

Freshman year, my son and his girlfriend did their best to make things work, despite the distance and student school vacations. They made the most of winter break and the summer and saw each other as much as possible. However, once dating on campus, with busy schedules which included Greek life for both of them as well as many other activities, student became harder to sustain their bond.

They broke up Thanksgiving of sophomore year, which was emotionally tough for both of them.

The Central Times

Another friend, whose son also had a high school girlfriend student he went to college and student a heart-breaking split at the end of his junior year, made the excellent point that smart phones and technology do not necessarily make long-distance relationships easier or better.

Being able to text, FaceTime, and Snapchat create an illusion of being close, yet the intimacy required to stay together may still be elusive.

And seeing a significant other having fun on social media can lead to misunderstandings as well of feelings of jealousy. As time goes on, and students become more enmeshed in their new lives, maintaining former relationships can become increasingly challenging.

My oldest son matured in so many ways during his undergraduate years that I barely recognized the version of the young man who accepted his diploma as the same person who started college and I saw significant changes in my middle son as well. High people grow, their transformations can divide as much school physical distance.

Even platonic friendships from the past can become difficult to sustain as new interests and friendships develop. The reality is the majority of high school relationships do not last.

Those first loves remain significant, a cherished part of the past and stepping stones to future relationships. And until the next serious relationship appears on the horizon, college is the perfect time to get to know many new people and experience all it has to offer.

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

Sign up to receive awesome content boston dating coach your inbox every week.

Read our privacy policy and terms for more info. Check your inbox or spam folder to confirm your subscription. Get engaging stories and helpful information all year long. Join our college parent newsletter! Share this:. Get stories and expert advice on all things related to college and parenting. Marlene Kern Fischer is a wife, mother, food shopper extraordinaire, author and college essay editor. Find her on Facebook at Thoughts From Aisle 4. Find Your University. First name. Last name. Don't Miss Out!