When I first started dating my husband, his military affiliation was the furthest thing from my mind. Eventually, however, the reality of being intimately ahem connected to a military man moved into focus. I had questions: How will the military affect your love life? How much time will you be able link spend together?

My spouse and I have made the conscious choice to separate our personal lives from the military. Dating, it creeps in. Please note that the impact of the military on your romance will be different for every couple. Your reaction to it, positive and negative, will be different. Ultimately, you can take each of these impacts as they come. Some will be harder to swallow than others, perhaps. But, speaking as a military spouse of over 13 years, soldier life, and how it impacts your relationship, is what you make of it.

Not everyone in the military will want to, or be able to, remain in the armed forces long term. Yes, some service members will stay in for twenty or more years. Others will only check this out for one four year enlistment or commission.

No matter how long your partner remains in uniform, military service will be in their blood for life. There are also many ways to be in the military. Enlisted personnel and commissioned officers is one distinction. Military specialties also require different types of work, none less important than the others. Personality and your romance languages will play more into communication, on the day-to-day level, than the military. You will need to determine how you best communicate together. How will you soldier conflicts or voice differing opinions?

How will you grow as a couple? None of these things will necessarily change because of military affiliation. However, practical things will be impacted. Your method of communication might change because of deployments, TDYs or other separations.

Today, you have lots of options not available to other military couples. You might be able to video chat, text, use other messaging apps, email or send letters. However, many main military locations provide dating of internet access. What you can communicate might also be affected. On deployment, your partner will not be able to share specific things with you, like deployment date information or about their soldier.

In turn, you also cannot share this sensitive information with others. However, as with all relationships, each partner can grow and change because of life experiences. I met my husband when we were in college. He had already completed a four year enlistment in the United States Marine Corps.

After graduation, and with his four-year degree in hand, he was able to commission as an officer. The things he has seen in his almost twenty-year career have changed him as a person. However, our love has remained constant.

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By the same token, moving several times and mothering two children has changed me. We have grown together. Couples do click grow apart. It happens, unfortunately. But it is likely not simply because of their military affiliation. It might be a side effect, due to PTSD or changing personalities following long separations, however.

And should it ever escalates to emotional, verbal or physical abuse, please seek help. Deployments are a major stressor for military relationships, both new and well established. You will be separated for weeks or months, up to and sometimes over a year. Communication will be more limited due to distance, their physical location and different time zones.

At the same time, your spouse will be carrying on their mission without the comforts of home. Living separate lives can be challenging under the best of circumstances.

And deployments are not the best circumstances.

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During deployment, remain transparent with each other and openly communicate about your expectations post-deployment. Girlfriends and boyfriends may not be kept in the loop automatically. Make sure your partner lists you as an approved visit web page and ensures that you are on all communications related to deployment. I remember the first time that we were separated.

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It felt like the world was ending and nothing would be right ever again. We, the kids and I, keep calm and just carry on. The world did not, in fact, end. And separations do eventually come to an end. The first few consider, fling dating site really of our first deployment together were rough.

Let yourself wallow in your emotions for a few days, if you are feeling despondent. You are allowed to feel your feelings. After that, find ways to make your deployment season normal: work, hobbies, friends—life. Put events on your calendar and create excitement for yourself. Build a routine at home that keeps things steady and calm. Meg Flanagan is a teacher, blogger and military spouse. She owns Meg Dating Education Solutionsan education advocacy service dedicated to serving families on the K journey.

You can find Meg on Facebook. Meg is also available as a freelance writer and personal education advocate! This is not a sponsored post; I have soldier received monetary compensation for this post. For many military spouses, direct sales is a stable, flexible. More and more, Instagram is becoming the perfect place for military spouses connect.

There are a ton of fantastic military spouse bloggers on Instagram who. Five minutes a day, delivered right to your inbox. Join me for this on-your-own-time masterclass. Close this search box. Meg Flanagan June 13, Pinterest Instagram Facebook Twitter. All of these things will factor into your relationship with your military loved one. Deployment and Your Military Relationship Deployments are a major stressor for military relationships, both new and well established. It will be an adjustment, but like all things, it is something you will get used to over time.

Keep it that way! Communicate openly and honestly.

How To Date a Military Man

Seek help, from a chaplain or other counselor of your preference, when things get rough. Social media does not reflect the truth, especially about relationships or friendships. Limit how much you share there, good or bad. What you post online lives forever! Distance can make the heart grow fonder—as long dating you both are putting in effort to grow in love dating. Date your partner because of who they are as a person soldier not because of military affiliation or perceived military benefits.

Doing otherwise is a recipe for disaster. You are move than your role as a military girlfriend or boyfriend, husband or wife. Develop your own interests and hobbies that make you happy and fulfilled. You, unless you are also in the military, do not wear rank.

Go slowly and take care of yourself. You are allowed to be your own person, to take time to relax and to stay true to yourself. Related Articles. Not sure what to read next? Here are some of the top related articles! Take control of your military life with these free courses! Download Open When Letter Topics!