Can I marry my Sister in Law? I have a question about second marriages that I would like to get some opinions on. I have been a widower now for 14 months. I am She is She and her husband and my wife and I were always very close. She has been an incredible friend this last year and helped me through my grieving process. We have been spending a moderate amount of time together. We get along famously and have similar interests.
I have become very fond of her. Is it inappropriate for me to ask her about possible dating with a long term relationship and even marriage on my mind? Or is it appropriate? Oh dating the way, neither of us has dated at all. The reason I post this question here is that I love that metafilter members don't hold back. What I am looking for is lots of opinions to mull law.
This is not exactly the same situation, but my two aunts married brothers. I never thought it was weird. I don't think this is weird, either. I think it's lovely. I'd just take it super slow sounds like you already kind of are.
How to Have the Kind of Sister-in-Law Relationship Your Friends Are Jealous Of
I know two couples who got married in the same situation. What was awkward but was worked through was the kids--it can be odd for one's aunt to become one's stepmother, even as an adult, or one's uncle to become one's stepfather. But in both of the cases I am familiar with, everyone became comfortable with the idea in time, and the marriages were in one case and are in the law happy.
See what she thinks. She may have irreversibly "brother-zoned" you--some people's minds and libidos work like that--but maybe not. Yes, of dating. As with seeing anyone you've known for some time, sister is good to take it slow and be very careful so as not to screw up what you had before by dating. Good luck! I have a friend who married her husband's brother after she was widowed. It makes sense that you would share similar values. I think it speaks sister of the spouses that you both lost. You're not blood related to her at all? I would say there is absolutely nothing inappropriate about this.
Just she may not think of you that way so don't come on too strong. Sorry, I didn't meant to suggest that one pair of widowed former in-laws who married were unhappy in their marriage; their marriage seemed to everyone sister knew them to be delightful and fun until one of them passed away.
Then the widow married for a third time, but to someone unrelated. I'll stop typing now because I've become irrelevant. How would they law to this? Would they be accepting and happy for youor skeeved out? How much does it matter to you what they think? Are there boundaries there that you are willing to test?
You have shared pain. You have bonded. Don't mistake this for romantic feelings. Related, my something yr old aunt just got married a week or so into a romance because of newfound religious beliefs. I thought it was weird, but typical of her.
One of her daughters was happy for law, 2 were shocked but kind of "whatever" about it, the other was horrified. I worked with a woman who married her late husband's brother. It seemed to work out well. I don't think you even that bangalore dating blog think to ask her about dating - that's for people who don't already know each other well.
Just see where things go. Dating knew someone whose mom died fairly young, and her father remarried her mom's identical twin sister, and then had another kid, so this friend of mine had a half-sister who was genetically her full sister. She seemed to be fine with it. It would be the opposite gender-wise but you sister be interested dating know about the practice of levirate marriage. People married their sisters-in-law in the "old country" all the time.
Before marrying my grandmother, my grandfather married her sister this was in Italy. It's often a very natural scenario for many people. As long as that's what people want, then it's totally appropriate. Wishing you all the best!
You are close, and have helped each other through difficult times. Romantic feelings can be built on this kind of close, bonded, trusting relationship, so I'm not sure what this means. I'm not trying to call someone out, I just think this statement is questionable. Helping each other through hard times is what a marriage is about, really, when you boil it all down -- at least in my view; some people obviously differ on that opinion.
I say go for more info, OP - if y'all are close, it should be OK. Take it super, super slow, don't push, and talk to her about it. Also, I'm sorry for your loss, and for your friend's loss as well.
Losing a wife or a sister is not easy. Nthing the totally fine with it. Just make sure you broach the subject with a built-in out in case she just wants to remain platonic family. I think it's unusual but not inappropriate, if she has read article feelings. I would be very careful, however, because you do have a long friendship that it would be sad to lose.
Relationships
Out of curiosity, have you sought any kind of grief therapy? I ask because--and only because--if you were a member of my family, I might dating that there's a chance that what you are attracted to law the continuity and the company more than the woman herself. That doesn't mean she isn't a lovely person, and it also doesn't mean that it's not a good reason to want to spend your life with her.
But your loss is still relatively recent, and I can see how a relationship with this woman could help soothe many of the difficult feelings dating must be experiencing. Again, that's not a reason not to be with her--if you two want a relationship, I wish you every happiness--but if I were her, I might worry whether you loved me for me, or because I help fill a void. But then, people marry for all kinds of reasons, and that's a perfectly legitimate reason to be together.
And you sound like a thoughtful person who isn't crashing into this blindly, which is good. All this to say: Maybe speak to a grief counselor, if you haven't already, and consider dating, if you haven't already. I am sorry for your loss. Whatever you decide to do, I hope you find happiness. I say give it here go. IF she's actually into the idea, I mean. Not only does it sister fine, it potentially saves everyone the hassle of dealing with new in-laws : posted by foodgeek at PM on April 5, [ 6 favorites ].
It's not inappropriate at all.
2. Be Honest
I think it's fine. Granted, this was many years ago, but after his wife died my great-grandpa law her sister. I don't think anyone thought it was weird. If you read article she feels the same sister, go for it!
I think it's not inappropriate either, but I echo the recommendation of some counseling. Since neither of you have dated, it could be that a large part of the attraction here is safety and familiarity. You don't have to go back 'on the market,' as it were, because someone who is already part of your life is right here. But it could also be fine for you to see and get to know other women who have no connection to your wife.
There are so many absolutely wonderful women who are available because of law spouse's earlier death. Since you haven't tried any dating at all, I would recommend questioning yourself as to whether your feelings are sister strong, or whether, in some way, this represents an easy way out. Take it slow. Otherwise, just fine and ethical. This is my biggest concern, and I think it bears repeating. I would dating very hesitant to discuss a romantic relationship with her unless you are quite sure she will at least be open-minded about it.