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Log in Register. Search titles only. Search Advanced search…. New posts. Search forums. Log in. Install the app. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding. You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly. You should upgrade or use an alternative browser. Dating While Married: How do you do it? Thread starter NerfHerder Start date Sep 18, dating NerfHerder Member. First a little perspective: I was never very confident dating when I was single - in the seven years I've been with my wife, my confidence has greatly increased, but I still don't really "get" dating.
Also, our situation is a little weird well, maybe not weird, but hard for people to believe sometimes in that my wife particularly wants me to find a girlfriend I do too, but she's actually been the one motivating and sort of prodding me to date. It seems like from looking at the stories I see here and have heard from talking to people on other messagers that women will give a man a chance if he lies and claims he's single and they find out laterbut if he says he's married, they won't give him a second glance.
When it comes to people in "real life" married seems that the women I am most interested in are ones that I married can't seem to figure out how to break it to them that I am actually available, despite the fact that I'm dating ad I'd settle for a little commiseration! I am new to to the forum, but I would suggest trying a poly dating site. Okcupid is for people who are monagamous, in general.
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From what I have read a lot of when do not understand poly, like most things people don't understand they fear it or judge it. I think that starting there you may have a better chance of finding a partner married is on the same page as you are.
I would maybe google a couple of sites, I know I read about a few but I can't find them at the moment, if I but them then i post it for ya. I hope that helps Kt. Click to expand Anneintherain Member. I still think OKC is great since you can keyword poly or whatever you want in your profile - including any of your interests like skiing, latin music, stamp collecting, or whatever you're interested in, so people looking for go here partners can find others with the same interests.
“I’ve been married before,” he told me on our first date.
That's also a good way to meet people that may end up having gf potential, if you're up for the friends first route too. I met both my husband and my boyfriend on OKC. I'd never give a guy a second chance for a date if they were married or co-habituating with a partner and didn't tell me before we met and we'd over 60s dating sites more than a few whenso I think that's the right way to go - maybe I'd have a different view on that if I were operating as a single woman.
Wouldn't take when too hard at all if people visit your profile and don't message you - I mean, there's hundreds of reasons I'd decide somebody wasn't right for me to get to know after clicking on their profile, plenty of people have clicked on mine and not wanted to write to dating - I decided to change mine to anonymous browsing, that way I have no clue who visits me so I don't have to think about it.
Emm Stealth Mod. How do you know your marital status is the reason people move on? It should be obvious from the fact that you show up as "Available" that there's someone else in the picture, so anyone looking for singles only isn't going to deliberately click through to begin with. I met all three! If I'd only found out after meeting them I probably wouldn't have wanted to see them again. If I'd found out after becoming intimate I certainly wouldn't.
AnnabelMore Active member. Could it be that you have the wrong attitude about it?
Dating While Married: How do you do it?
People respond very differently based on how present something. What is it that really keeps you from trying with one of these women? What if your wife initiated dating "Fyi, hubby married I have an open marriage and he's too shy to let you know he likes you. Last edited: Sep 18, NerfHerder said:.
Wow, thanks for all the responses. I really hate that I can't spend time on this site from work I was able to spend a little time working on my OKCupid profile though, so that's got to be worth something! Emm said:.
AnnabelMore said:. I would focus on this angle, online dating is great, but always more of a crapshoot. What's the deal with that? It sounds like you're just looking for an additional relationship to appease your wife. You may tell yourself you want to find someone, but if she has to prod you, it sounds like your heart isn't in it or you lack confidence. If you don't really want to pursue someone else, don't. Potentials might be picking up on your ambivalence. If your wife wants things equal, that is unrealistic - it here a race.
Let relationships develop for each of you in your own time, and don't try to force anything on yourself that you're not really ready for. Wow, I can definitely see how it could be read like that, but it's certainly not how I meant it.
I've been over the years we've talked about it a little reluctant to go looking precisely because she does not have someone nor is she looking very hard - she says I'm dating for men and is really only interested in adding a woman but I do not want to be the click here pushing her to let me get a girlfriend. She also knows I'm the type of person who tends to do everything I can to give her and my kids what married want and sometime skip out on things I need to do it.
Therefore she's pushing me, but only in a good way. I occasionally need a push, and I definitely want another relationship. I've had my account up on OKC for two months now and only gotten the one response. I suppose it says something that I then met her and went on a couple dates, but Andy New member.
Hello, I am kinda coming back from the dead here after a long hiatus from this site, but not the poly lifestyle. I am married. I am very much poly, my wife is supportive of me, but not really looking for anything past friends. I totally feel when pain. I am currently off OKC, but when I was when I was always upfront about my situation within the first messages exchanged. I can't be ok with leading anyone on. I love women, and feel like a good portion of the male population treats them poorly anyway, so I refuse to jump on that wagon.
I am not only enabling a gender stereotype, but also possibly turning some poor girls first exposure to poly into something that leaves a really bad taste in her mouth. Married have dated both openly poly women and women that were not poly, but visit web page enough of me to date and explore accepting it. I have sent out about 4 bajillion https://passive-income.info/hookup-id.php. I have got a handful back.
Few mean words, mostly no thank yous or chatter than burns out fast. I can't remember how I worded my profile. I listed as "available" And don't assume that tells the story, people don't notice there is "single" AND "available"mentioned I was looking for new connections and open to seeing where things go, and in the "most private thing I dating willing to admit" dating, wrote that I have a deep interest dating poly and open relationships.
If people find the concept icky, they can stop right there, and if that doesn't phase or intrigues them, we can chat and expand on the topic. Blatantly putting out there that your married is blunt honesty, married will likely deep six any chatter before it begins. Its more likely someone will consider accepting you if you have had the opportunity married catch their attention via a few well written messages first.
WhatHappened Active member. Excellent post, Whathappened. I could not agree much more. I totally respect the ladies that are looking for "the one" and hold on to when dream of marriage. Having been there now, I have mixed feelings about it personally, but I do see it work out blissfully for many, and genuinely wish that for anyone seeking that lifestyle. It never hurts to ask but always hurts to push Cleo New member. Andy said:. Dating been lucky to have a strong poly community locally where I can meet people, but I've also met a few through OKC.
When I message people I comment in a way that makes it clear Here actually read their profile. My wife puts in her profile that she'll respond to anyone that sends her a link to a webcomic, when very few do.