To explore this issue, we spoke with Alisa Foreman, a licensed marriage and family therapist and executive clinical director of Optimum Performance Institute in Woodland Hills, California. The transitional living program works with young adults of all genders who are dealing with various mental health issues, including technology addiction.
Having provided therapy to adolescents, couples, and families, Foreman offered internet insights on the difference between online and traditional dating as well as the work required to build a strong relationship in the digital world. According to a survey of U. So, what are the differences between internet dating vs.
They start with the way you connect with other people: via technology harmful than face to face. In addition, having relationships digitally allows you to date people who live far away from you. The other person harmful be in another state or country. Another difference between online dating vs.
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While there are benefits to connecting with people digitally, there are also negative effects of online dating. Foreman said one benefit of Internet dating is it helps manage social anxiety in some young adults who get very overwhelmed socially. I think it allows young people to feel more comfortable going into a internet where they know a person is looking for the same things they are. It takes some of the pressure off the process of exploring that and having those challenging conversations.
Was it something I said?
Introduction
There must be something wrong with me. This can impact mood as well, as you experience a lack of connection to other people and spend increased amounts of time alone. Just as there can be a tie between depression and dating apps, Foreman said there can be one between online dating and anxiety. It can start with putting together a profile in an app. Are they going to like the picture I put out? Is what I wrote significant enough? The desire to be liked and feel accepted by peers, she said, particularly in a romantic way, can create a lot of anxiety for a young person and greatly impact their mood and self-esteem.
Are they going to actually like me once they meet me in person?
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With apps, young adults can get hooked on continually updating their profile or checking to see if anyone responded to them. An important drawback to dating in the digital world is that it can make it harder for you to relate to people face to face.
As mentioned earlier, getting rejected can be a serious issue when you build your relationships in the digital world. And what do you value in other people?
How do I reciprocate in a relationship? How do I make this relationship fit within my life?
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Do our goals line up? Do they treat me the way I want to be treated? You want to be there for that person and know that that person is there for you as well. You want to listen to them and feel heard by them. So, whether you meet in person or online, you still have to put in the work to sustain it. You also need to keep in mind that the psychological effects of online dating could be both positive and negative.
What are the risks?
Many young adults use technology to connect with others. Regardless of the platform, the goal is to find the best way to connect and build relationships with others while staying true to ourselves, setting realistic expectations, and minimizing the negative effects.
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